What to do when you feel weak and inadequate

I love the story of the feeding of the thousands with just a few loaves and fishes in Matthew 14:13-21. It’s one of those great Bible stories that I remember being told to me via flannel graph in Sunday School. In this story we see Jesus being concerned for His own rest as well as for the crowd’s hunger. And it’s a huge reminder of God’s strength when I am weak.

In this Scripture I see six things we need to do when we feel weak and inadequate. And, by the way, every Christian should feel somewhat weak and inadequate.

ONE  Withdraw.

Feeling feeble is a reminder that you need God’s strength. Like Jesus, you need to recognize your need to get alone with God. Matthew says “he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place” (verse 13). Each of us needs communion with our Creator. We need regular time alone with our Savior. We sometimes call this quiet time—time spent with God in His Word and in prayer. But there are other forms as well—praying aloud in the car, listening to the Bible read to us, walking in nature by ourselves. Even the most outgoing, extroverted of us needs this quiet time alone. And especially when we’re feeling less than.

(I’d like to add to this, that we also need proper rest, exercise, and nutrition. But that’s for another post.)

TWO  Focus on others’ needs.

“When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick” (verse 14). We can’t stay withdrawn forever. God still calls us to have compassion and meet the needs of others. This is especially important when we’re feeling needy ourselves because it takes the focus off of us and onto others. It changes our perspective.

THREE  Find strength in numbers.

We see that the disciples join Jesus in verse 15. We need our family and our brothers and sisters in Christ. For those of us more introverted and less outgoing, the temptation will be to stay in the withdrawn stage above. But you can’t stay there. We need others so desperately. Your spouse can give you insight that you lack. Your small group can come around and support you. Your friends can keep you sane in times like this. But you have to let them in.

FOUR  Give thanks for what you do have.

“Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves” (verse 19). I believe there’s more here than just asking a blessing over the food. Giving thanks for what we have, even if what we have seems paltry, is a discipline that becomes especially important when we feel needy. In fact, it may need to become just that: a discipline that we stick too. Maybe it involves writing down three things we’re grateful for during our quiet time. Or asking everyone at the dinner table each night what they are grateful to God for about the day. Or making it a habit to write in a gratitude journal before heading to bed. There are many ways to do it, but we need to make sure we change our perspective by focusing on what we’re thankful for rather than being unhealthily fixated on what we don’t have.

FIVE  Use what you have to bless others.

Another way to change our outlook is to use what we have, no matter how small, to bless others. Just as Jesus and the disciples gave away the small amount of loaves and fish (verse 19), we need to give. Sometimes this may involve money, sometimes giving away possessions. It may involve a gift of our time or our expertise. However we give, it will bless us as much or more than it blesses the recipient.

SIX  Expect God to be strong where you are weak.

Just as the loaves and fishes mysteriously multiplied to feed thousands of people (verses 20-21), God multiplies our efforts when we give—even when we feel weak and inadequate. Many times we may never know how far our efforts go. Our contribution may seem small and weak, but Jesus can multiply it to make it more than sufficient. As Paul says, Christ’s power is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).

BONUS POINT  Get special help if you need it.

This may take the form of a minister, a counselor, a doctor, whatever. There are times when we need the specialized care of a professional. Please get help if you need it.